WTAF Post Office

Stacy J. Sciarra:  Happy Hump Day my little fuckers. Today I would like to discuss a problem that I've been having with the post office. It's a What the Actual Fuck type problem. I have a fellow Raiders fan friend that I frequently like to send boxes of Raiders stuff too. She lives in California. I live in Florida. I also know that the post office has been having ridiculous problems...bugeting... closing facilities... blah blah blah. However, every single time I send a package to Kali in Cali ... the post office fucks it up. Every. Single. Time. The first time, I thought it was me. I double-checked with her to make sure I had her correct address (it was returned to me the first time.) The address was fine. I sent it again. The second time I sent a box, I double-checked to make sure I had the right spelling of her name (sometimes that makes a difference, I guess)... but this time... the third time, I'm getting a little pissed. Each time, I'm spending around $15.00 to send her packages ... and the post office can't tell me what I'm doing wrong ... neither can she... oh yeah, and the boxes get there all types of destroyed.

Is it the fact that I live in Florida and she lives in California? Is that just a little farther than the post office wants to deliver my sweet packages? Is it the fact that the boxes are filled with Raiders goodies? Do I have a disgruntled fan on my hands? Am I using the wrong font on my address labels? Dear lord!! What is it?!? I've checked, rechecked, double checked ...and simply cannot find the problem!!!!

...however, that's nothing on what I lost sending to my friend Jessi.  Awhile ago, Jessi's car was broken into and her purse was stolen. Her purse was stolen with some money in it, blah blah blah.  I decided that I am an awesome friend and sent her a replacement. But not just a replacement. I sent her one of my Prada purses (go ahead, those of you who don't know, look it up ... it's a very expensive purse... it just happened to be too small for my taste, as I basically carry a suitcase with me...) Anyway, if memory serves me correctly, I might have put a wallet in there, too... because I know that I tucked a considerable amount of cash in there - just to help out. Wouldn't you know it, I was in such a hurry to send it, I didn't trace the fucker... and it never got there. Ever. To this day.

...it also happens in the reverse. My hilarious co-anchor, Brad, sent me a book last year around this time that never made it to me, either. It just simply disappeared. WTAF?!?! Now, I know that there are "special services" you can purchase from the post office to ensure delivery ... but... um, it's the post office. Their job is to deliver mail and packages... their job is to do their job! Why do I have to purchase "extra services" to ensure that my package will be delivered....?!?! It's extortion! It's blackmail! It's ... something.

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUUUUUUUUUCK?!?!?!

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